6:40 am
Morning. Just talked to d***. Gave him 1 more chance. Yes, I'm a pushover. Pero now,may kasulatan na and admonissions
7:01 am
me: hay... wala bang confidentiality?
7:04 am
Will add that. where are you na?
me: Just woke up. grabe my cycle this month. am extra bloated, my discharge is bad, plus i feel like i got run over by a truck, which usually only happens when i have my period na. Not in between!
7:13 am
I miss you
me: :) a little lang. proven na yun. :)
7:21 am
are you excited to see me?
me: ok lang. :) let me get dressed.
12:29 pm
parang di mo ko miss
me: that's your punishment kc umalis ka na't lahat, you didn't tell me where and what your day was like
[call]
me: i'm having lunch with c**** and ***g.
12:53 pm
***g wokeup na?
me: Yes. STOP IT.
1:07 pm
miss mo na ko?
me: ok lang. kwent2han kami 3.
2:43 pm
ok
me: still in hospital?
2:57 pm
Just got home. Where are you? Miss mo ko sobra no?
me: ok lang. i try not to miss people who have little time for me. :) on my way to pick up javi. you staying home?
3:01 pm
i have 3 meetings. kamusta * *******? sorry had to ask
me: will finish from home. coding ako. after javi, jim won't be able t come back for me till after 7 so i had to leave w him na. please don't apologize for asking. ur my ****. u shud ask.
me: and you know what, you don't have to tell me your sched. I'll stop asking
3:09 pm
when i tell you my schedule because i want to not that i have to.
me: Right. and you haven't been doing that.
me: are you cranky?
3:15 pm
sad. i want to see you but i cant cancel my meetings because of urgency
me: not asking you to cancel your meetings. but i will be honest and say that i noticed. and napaisip ako.
3:17 pm
na wala ako time for you?
me: ya. not just being together. you also text less often. and are generally distracted. am not complaining. its not my place to complain. i know you're busy. lots of work, family concerns. but shempre i notice. and i think about it. and i try to deal with it and rationalize.
3:23 pm
where did you have lunch? what did you eat? Thanks pala for mongo
me: had lunch with c**** and ***g. told them about ***. ***g told c****, nawalan na nga ao ng daddy tapos aalis ka pa. so i followed her hint and said, ako naman, pinalayas ko na nga asawa ko, pati ikaw, aalis ka pa. Hahaha! d malaman ni c**** gagawin!:) we ate in chocolate kiss. i had tomato soup, ceasar's salad and pesto foccacia. didn't finish soup, but i finished ***g's rice. why you changing the topic? malaman yun huli kong text. :)
3:28 pm
do you want to have dinner with me tom. - soft shell crabs?
me: cant. have dinner with friends. :-( 7 days in a week and you chose the day i had plans.
3:32 pm
sorry kung wala ako sa timing
me: you know it doesn't help when you do that. :-( guess what, he actually moved stuff out. still lots of stuff left. but two shelves were cleared out. hmmm....
4:16 pm
you will now have more bed space. :)
me: like now. i don't know what it means when you don't text back, or when you don't answer certain texts. again, this is just statement. if you care to explain, thank you. if not, ok lang.
me: am sorry if i'm not much of a comfort to you today. am having a very tough last few days. fought with my mom, kicked out my husband, c**** is leaving, and i really feel like you're losing interest. but again, that's not a complaint. i know who i am and what my place is.
[call]
me: that was not meant to stress u further that you need to step out to call me. but it did, and im sorry. i shouldve known better. lets talk soon. i'll see if i can follow my friends after dinner tomorrow so i can have dinner with you,if your offer still stands.
4:29 pm
early dinner na lang para you can follow. got hurt that you thought i'm losing interest. then again, thats what you feel. i hope you believe me that i'm not losing interest. i love you princess.
me: ok. early dinner.
4:36 pm
ok? malaman yata text ko tapos ok lang? haha
me: your statement could be discussed along with what i want to talk about. connected. just don't know if we'll be ableto talk tomorrow.
4:39 pm
ok. do you love me less now?
me: no. of course not. it doesn't work that way for me. i'm afraid of the opposite. which is why i want to discuss with you.
4:43 pm
so you love me more? cant focus on my meeting. haha
me: ano ka ba? para kang bata. when we talk like this, its hard to imagine you're 12 years older. :) for me, its a natural progression. its never static. i see you more, i talk to you often, i share my life with you. i learn to depend on you and to have expectations. if the world permitted what we have, that would be a good thing. but as it is, all those may just complicate things unless we can be sure we're both on the same page. which is why i want to talk.
4:52 pm
i have a reflection. with you, i can be myself and i can be any age i want - 3, 10, 21, 30, 45. that only means i am at peace and happy with you and that i don't need to preted. that makes me vulnerable.
me: :) i'm attached to the 3, 10, 21, 30 and 45 year old versions. Really wish things were different
me: bert, i have a massive headache and i can't think straight. would it be ok if i turn in draft tomorrow morning? not feeling well right now. i think its stress. i'm sorry. of course, you can go all gcc and be mad. i kinda deserve it. alam ko naman eh. am so jahe nga to be asking 4 yet another extension.
4:56 pm
extension granted. Not that you are like the rest but i would say yes if it was ***g etc. sorry if i'm adding to your stress
me: no. you and my kids are my source of comfort right now. which is why i was sad that you've been a bit busy and couldn't spend time with me.
me: i forgot to say, thanks bert, for the extension.
5:00 pm
thanks lang? walang i love you?
me: don't push it. but nga i didn't deny it eh. :) go back to work please. i want to have a positive impact on you. i don't want to be a distraction. :) but i will tell you this, i miss kissing you. first, short, lippy ones. then, with bites on your lips. then, i'll hold your face, then your neck. then, all wet and slobbery. then, i'll top, with my eyes closed, rest my face on yours, give you a small kiss on your cheek, then hug you.
5:10 pm
i miss that too. will call you later. rest ka muna
me: k
me: bigla kong naisip, you didn't reply what you had for lunch. i asked you.
me: bigla kong naisip, you didn't reply what you had for lunch. i asked you.
me: are you there? if you are, just text, yes, i'm in a meeting. Text you later.
6:23 pm
in a meeting. call you later
me: ok
7:12 pm
are you in marie france?
me: yeah. how did you know? you done with meetings?
7:14 pm
you told me you will go at 7pm. i remember. 1 more meeting
me: ok. done with 2nd meeting?
7:15 pm
yes. same place lang
me: ah. ok.
me: they are still bloated. but not like saturday and sunday.
7:18 pm
i missed that. haha
me: yah. too bad for you
[call from me]
me: that's why i asked you if you were don't with 2nd meeting. didn't you know you were with someone.
7:23 pm
dumating na 3rd
me: ok
[call] pick you up? okay. where are you? near the house. i'll just take a shower. see you.
me: where are you?
[call] crossing edsa
me: i'm just waiting for your call
[call] i'm here. okay. i'll be right out.
me: let's talk about this soon. for now, don't worry. i won't be going anywhere soon. am glad you decided to pass by for me. maski cranky ka. :)
10:22 pm
ok. don't worry about me
me:of course i worry. i don't want to be on your list of worries or concerns. i'd rather be on your happy list.
10:28 pm
you are in my happy list
me: hmmm... right nw, i know i'm on your "bothers-me-so-much-i-have-to-drive-around" list.
10:43 pm
You are in my "i-want-to-make-you-very-happy-and-i-love-you-princess" list. favor. don't doubt na my sincere love for you ha
me: let's talk about it first. you home na?
10:53 pm
jut got it. i wanted to hug you kanina
10:53 pm
Just got in rather. i wanted to hug you kanina
me: why didn't you?
me: she didn't say anything naman...
11:01 pm
she didn't say anything. i stopped myself from being lambng kanina because i felt you didn't want me to. na baka you might think that is all im after. believe me when i say that that is not the case
me: i believe you
11:20 pm
i found you pretty kanina. I know, always naman
me: haha... talga? :)
11:22 pm
and yummy
me: what you thinking?
11:26 pm
Wanted to kiss you all over. again, my fault. haha. i forgot to tell you something
me: what?
11:32 pm
i love you my princess. june 30, 2008. Happy 1 day
me: hahaha!
me: is it that feelting that you count days, not months? hahaha! teasing... :)
11:37 pm
I will sleep na. Night. Tom will be a lot better than today
me: ok. good night, hoh. :)
11:38 pm
mwah
Monday, June 30, 2008
remiss
Dear SD,
today was the first day we were together as you and me, and with only you having issues. my issue having packed his bags and left this afternoon.
i don't want things to be complicated between us. but like i told you earlier, thngs are never static. and as time passes, things between us deepen, and,expectedly, becomemore complicated.
i meant what i said. i've always put in issue that he never prioritized me. that i was never first in line anymore. and that it pains me that with you, being number 2 is the best that i could ever hope for. and that asking for things, making demands, is not allowed.
and i really appreciated that you understood me. how, by telling me you love me, you take on the responsiblity of proving it. you said, "i have been remiss, on the premise that i love you." i am thankful that you really understood what i felt. that when you tell me you love me, you take on the responsiblity and duties that come with a declaration of love. and by admitting that you were remiss, you proved to me that at the very very very least, you intend to be sincere. makes me all in love with you more.
yes. tama ka. more everyday. so much, yes, so much, that i'm willing to be your number two. but i at least need to know that 1) i am your only no. 2; 2) you are commited to me as your no. 2; and 3) i am a perpetual no. 2, so that when things go wrong, you will not bail at the first instance, but instead will work on it, stay with me, as if i were the only 1 you had. i cannot be number two na panandalian.
yes, in the shallow sense, you have been remiss. but in the sense that counts, you're more than i could hope for.
today was the first day we were together as you and me, and with only you having issues. my issue having packed his bags and left this afternoon.
i don't want things to be complicated between us. but like i told you earlier, thngs are never static. and as time passes, things between us deepen, and,expectedly, becomemore complicated.
i meant what i said. i've always put in issue that he never prioritized me. that i was never first in line anymore. and that it pains me that with you, being number 2 is the best that i could ever hope for. and that asking for things, making demands, is not allowed.
and i really appreciated that you understood me. how, by telling me you love me, you take on the responsiblity of proving it. you said, "i have been remiss, on the premise that i love you." i am thankful that you really understood what i felt. that when you tell me you love me, you take on the responsiblity and duties that come with a declaration of love. and by admitting that you were remiss, you proved to me that at the very very very least, you intend to be sincere. makes me all in love with you more.
yes. tama ka. more everyday. so much, yes, so much, that i'm willing to be your number two. but i at least need to know that 1) i am your only no. 2; 2) you are commited to me as your no. 2; and 3) i am a perpetual no. 2, so that when things go wrong, you will not bail at the first instance, but instead will work on it, stay with me, as if i were the only 1 you had. i cannot be number two na panandalian.
yes, in the shallow sense, you have been remiss. but in the sense that counts, you're more than i could hope for.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
29 June 2008
7:29 am
Good morning princess
me: good morning.
7:32 am
Kanina ka pa gising. Was not sure kaya i texted you now.
me: no. nowlag. alarm was for 730.
me: maybe i expected you to miss me more and was disappointed when you obviously didn't. but that's ok. ganun eh. reality check for me.
8:01 am
call you in a bit
me: ok lang. not asking for a discussion. just telling you why am inis. i'll be fine.
me:don't call na. won't be able to talk.
8:19 am
Can i text?
me: ok
9:12 am
couldnot text earlier. Brought jessie to airport. I think whatever i say now regarding yesterday and the dare you won't believe. I said everything yesterday and as far as i am concerned they are all true. i love you. in philstar today, there is article on effect on meralco incomeif DTI petition will be granted by ERC. If I will be chair, there will be great pressure from all sides.
me: she left na?that was a short stop over. i never said i didn't believe you. my issue was with my own expectations which needed tempering. i suppose i needed to take the whole situation in stock din. things mejo progressed faster and further than i thought. re erc,i'm sure you'll find a way to bring things together. ning, chris, ria, myself, and the rest of your staff will fill in the work you need done. don't worry.
10:15 am
What are you doing? Where are you?
me: galleria. pacquiao. but stepped out for a while. walking around. 2 more matches before main fight.
10:17 am
you really going there to watch? who you with?
me: yes. sayang. am with j. but he's at the theater. no reserved seating. we're taking turns walking around. me first.
10:20 am
that's nice. :)
me: ok. i don't know what that means.
10:28 am
Teasing. kahit na am like this, do you still miss me? Care for me?
me: what do you mean khit na ur like this? what's like this?
10:35 am
1 who fell short of your expectations
me: what? why are ou being so drama? it was me who expected too much. that was my issue. you haven't done anything wrong.
me: can you take a call?
[call]
12:04 pm
so you stil love me 1.5?
me: i'll be out of reach for a while. am just really upset. no with you. nothing to do with you. you're one of the more pleasant things in my life. its not you. you can text. but you can't call. will be speaking to sab first.
12:08 pm
Ok. Let me know what happens to pacquiao
me: if won. 9th round knock out. but i didn't get to watch.
12:10 pm
If won? He won?
me: yes
me: are you eating?
12:30 pm
About to in my nanay's house. Why were you not able to watch?
me: that's the reason i'm really upset. i don't want to involve you. what happened is an example of why things are so bad na.
12:46 pm
Do you want to talk about it? Have you eaten?
me: i don't know if you're the right person to talk to. and no. am not hungry.
12:48 pm
Ok. Do you miss me? You don't have to answer
m: can you take a call?
12:53 pm
Tried to call you. Wrong number.
me: you can't call nga eh. i'll call.
12:54 pm
ok
me: you were never panakip butas. which is why i don't run to you when we have problems, or make sumbong when he upsets me. with you,i had a clean slate. i don't want you to think that i want you to fill his shoes. i don't. i need a man with new shoes altogether. hahahah.... and i think hindi din ikaw yun. your shoes are already taken. so what we have, i'm taking day by day. which is why the reassessment of my expectations was timely. the closet traditionalist began to see beyond what was allowed. it was the romantic in me. and with you, it was easy to feel safe and secure. yes sd, i miss you,and i love you. but in the for now kind of way cause thats the only thing allowed.
1:21 pm
I love you more
me: what do you mean more? more than before?
1:37 pm
Than before. Than yesterday.
me: :) makes me lucky and unlucky both at te same time:-(
1:59 pm
Where are you? What ya doing?
me: just got home. looking for something to eat. hay...
me: hahaha... tonypet photo ops with manny
2:54 pm
Can I call you later? Wil text 1st
me: you can call me anytime. am home alone. maids lang
me: will nap first
3:35 pm
Ok.Text me when you get up. I have 2 meetings - 5pm and 8pm
me: ok. will be at my mom's house
me: mongo lang tom right? spaghetti postponed for another time?
4:16 pm
Yes. HOst ang gcc office sa flag tom.
me: ok. and... is there something i should be worried about other than being on time?
4:18 pm
You want to take lead in singing of national anthem?
me: no... i really don't want to take the lead in anything. :) d ako c yen. :) ayoko ng tinitingnan ako ng ganun.
4:18 pm
ok
me: what are you doing? you didn't remind me about i will take care of you. finished na ba?
4:24 pm
Finish na. Wil take a shower lang. Getting ready or 5pm meeting. Call you when on the road
[call]
me: to be fair to j (and to myself, for choosing him), he was a really nice guy. very sweet, thoughtful, carinoso and considerate when we were younger. complete opposite of what he is to me now. but i think ealy parenthood changed him. hmmm... my mistake was thinking the change was temporary and that at some point, he would change back. i just had to say that.
5:21 pm
You would not have loved him if he was not ideal... then
me: yes and i think that for years, i lived with the ideal him, while completely ignoring what he'd become. Lalo na when i thought i'd see glimpses of the old him. Took a long time before i stopped living for what mariel calls "snippets of attention." and that's just the personal relationship aspect. wala pa yun infidelity nya, and the fact that until recently, i literaly paid or everything. till now, getting him to share in the expenes is like pulling teeth. then you happened. and you reminded me how it was to be treated like the princess that i am. its my tragedy that you are also flawed. but not your fault. still, i cannot pin my happiness on you. which is wy the rules between us should change too.
5:35 pm
Change rules between us
me: it has something to do with reassessingmhy expectations. we can talk about it when we have the opportunity to talk nt as gcc-gca. i hope the kapalit of my current misery is your appointment. Gosh. am so bloated from this ovulating that my boobs are literally popping out of my bra.
5:41 pm
Thats good. i would want to see that. Haha. Im eating french fries and having coke 0. sorry, stressed ako
[call from me]
me: last na on the topic of bloatd boobs. in the animal world, when the female ovulates, her body changes, and her smell changes, all to attract a mate. am i attracting you?
5:52 pm
Sobra. And you [know] what happens to the male specie when he gets excited?
me: ew! but seriously, in the animal world, the males strut, vie for attention bhy building the better next, offering the bigger prey,or battlin the competition. which will you do? to convince me you're worthy of my bloated boobs! hahaha!
5:55 pm
I will just be my cutie, carinoso and caring self
me: so which one is that? strutting with ostentatious display of feathers?
5:57 pm
Strutting with no clothes
me: ew!
5:59 pm
Cong ** and **** said matapang ka raw kahit may gunshot
me: what does that mean? nagpasundo nga ako eh.:)
6 pm
Matapang daw kayo ni ****
me: hahahaha...
me: curious. when you leave the house, nasasabika ba where you're going and what time you'll be back? wondering...
[call]: yes. i give an idea of what time i'll get home. when i cannot make it on time, i text to give her an estimate. me: that's nice of you.
9:35 pm
Sorry. No batt. I charge my phone everynight except saturday night. i drain my batt on sunday. I love you very much too
me: ok... i don't know what you're talking about. and draining your batt, who told you to do that?
9:57 pm
Para longer life ang batt. I miss you too
me: who said that? and may i just point out, gthat for someone who spends so mcuh, you're penny pinching on your batter at the expense of your availability to people? namely me? :)
me: I also forgot to point out that a batt cant cost you more than a couple of thousand bucks. but u cant put a price on the time you have w me?!? hahahaha...
10:15 pm
I miss you too
me:so non-responsive! move to strike.
10:16 pm
I love you too. June 19, 2008
me: can you please text me something conversational? :)
10:P18 pm
I promise to charge my phone everyday. Im solooking forward to se you tom.
me: that's better. :) meds? You flipping channels na?
10:25 pm
Tooks meds. Watching rocky channel 51. Ikaw?
me: blogging. new daily habit.
10:29 pm
See, you horoscope agrees with your revelation
me: i told j to clear out. tha needed saying for years... no revelation there. what talking about? :)
10:34 pm
Revelation that you love me
me: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?! :) :) :)
10:43 pm
What time will you be in office tom
me: will try to be early. maybe 8?
10:47 pm
Ok. Sleep na ko. Night. I love you princess
me: ok. night bert
10:48 pm
:)
Good morning princess
me: good morning.
7:32 am
Kanina ka pa gising. Was not sure kaya i texted you now.
me: no. nowlag. alarm was for 730.
me: maybe i expected you to miss me more and was disappointed when you obviously didn't. but that's ok. ganun eh. reality check for me.
8:01 am
call you in a bit
me: ok lang. not asking for a discussion. just telling you why am inis. i'll be fine.
me:don't call na. won't be able to talk.
8:19 am
Can i text?
me: ok
9:12 am
couldnot text earlier. Brought jessie to airport. I think whatever i say now regarding yesterday and the dare you won't believe. I said everything yesterday and as far as i am concerned they are all true. i love you. in philstar today, there is article on effect on meralco incomeif DTI petition will be granted by ERC. If I will be chair, there will be great pressure from all sides.
me: she left na?that was a short stop over. i never said i didn't believe you. my issue was with my own expectations which needed tempering. i suppose i needed to take the whole situation in stock din. things mejo progressed faster and further than i thought. re erc,i'm sure you'll find a way to bring things together. ning, chris, ria, myself, and the rest of your staff will fill in the work you need done. don't worry.
10:15 am
What are you doing? Where are you?
me: galleria. pacquiao. but stepped out for a while. walking around. 2 more matches before main fight.
10:17 am
you really going there to watch? who you with?
me: yes. sayang. am with j. but he's at the theater. no reserved seating. we're taking turns walking around. me first.
10:20 am
that's nice. :)
me: ok. i don't know what that means.
10:28 am
Teasing. kahit na am like this, do you still miss me? Care for me?
me: what do you mean khit na ur like this? what's like this?
10:35 am
1 who fell short of your expectations
me: what? why are ou being so drama? it was me who expected too much. that was my issue. you haven't done anything wrong.
me: can you take a call?
[call]
12:04 pm
so you stil love me 1.5?
me: i'll be out of reach for a while. am just really upset. no with you. nothing to do with you. you're one of the more pleasant things in my life. its not you. you can text. but you can't call. will be speaking to sab first.
12:08 pm
Ok. Let me know what happens to pacquiao
me: if won. 9th round knock out. but i didn't get to watch.
12:10 pm
If won? He won?
me: yes
me: are you eating?
12:30 pm
About to in my nanay's house. Why were you not able to watch?
me: that's the reason i'm really upset. i don't want to involve you. what happened is an example of why things are so bad na.
12:46 pm
Do you want to talk about it? Have you eaten?
me: i don't know if you're the right person to talk to. and no. am not hungry.
12:48 pm
Ok. Do you miss me? You don't have to answer
m: can you take a call?
12:53 pm
Tried to call you. Wrong number.
me: you can't call nga eh. i'll call.
12:54 pm
ok
me: you were never panakip butas. which is why i don't run to you when we have problems, or make sumbong when he upsets me. with you,i had a clean slate. i don't want you to think that i want you to fill his shoes. i don't. i need a man with new shoes altogether. hahahah.... and i think hindi din ikaw yun. your shoes are already taken. so what we have, i'm taking day by day. which is why the reassessment of my expectations was timely. the closet traditionalist began to see beyond what was allowed. it was the romantic in me. and with you, it was easy to feel safe and secure. yes sd, i miss you,and i love you. but in the for now kind of way cause thats the only thing allowed.
1:21 pm
I love you more
me: what do you mean more? more than before?
1:37 pm
Than before. Than yesterday.
me: :) makes me lucky and unlucky both at te same time:-(
1:59 pm
Where are you? What ya doing?
me: just got home. looking for something to eat. hay...
me: hahaha... tonypet photo ops with manny
2:54 pm
Can I call you later? Wil text 1st
me: you can call me anytime. am home alone. maids lang
me: will nap first
3:35 pm
Ok.Text me when you get up. I have 2 meetings - 5pm and 8pm
me: ok. will be at my mom's house
me: mongo lang tom right? spaghetti postponed for another time?
4:16 pm
Yes. HOst ang gcc office sa flag tom.
me: ok. and... is there something i should be worried about other than being on time?
4:18 pm
You want to take lead in singing of national anthem?
me: no... i really don't want to take the lead in anything. :) d ako c yen. :) ayoko ng tinitingnan ako ng ganun.
4:18 pm
ok
me: what are you doing? you didn't remind me about i will take care of you. finished na ba?
4:24 pm
Finish na. Wil take a shower lang. Getting ready or 5pm meeting. Call you when on the road
[call]
me: to be fair to j (and to myself, for choosing him), he was a really nice guy. very sweet, thoughtful, carinoso and considerate when we were younger. complete opposite of what he is to me now. but i think ealy parenthood changed him. hmmm... my mistake was thinking the change was temporary and that at some point, he would change back. i just had to say that.
5:21 pm
You would not have loved him if he was not ideal... then
me: yes and i think that for years, i lived with the ideal him, while completely ignoring what he'd become. Lalo na when i thought i'd see glimpses of the old him. Took a long time before i stopped living for what mariel calls "snippets of attention." and that's just the personal relationship aspect. wala pa yun infidelity nya, and the fact that until recently, i literaly paid or everything. till now, getting him to share in the expenes is like pulling teeth. then you happened. and you reminded me how it was to be treated like the princess that i am. its my tragedy that you are also flawed. but not your fault. still, i cannot pin my happiness on you. which is wy the rules between us should change too.
5:35 pm
Change rules between us
me: it has something to do with reassessingmhy expectations. we can talk about it when we have the opportunity to talk nt as gcc-gca. i hope the kapalit of my current misery is your appointment. Gosh. am so bloated from this ovulating that my boobs are literally popping out of my bra.
5:41 pm
Thats good. i would want to see that. Haha. Im eating french fries and having coke 0. sorry, stressed ako
[call from me]
me: last na on the topic of bloatd boobs. in the animal world, when the female ovulates, her body changes, and her smell changes, all to attract a mate. am i attracting you?
5:52 pm
Sobra. And you [know] what happens to the male specie when he gets excited?
me: ew! but seriously, in the animal world, the males strut, vie for attention bhy building the better next, offering the bigger prey,or battlin the competition. which will you do? to convince me you're worthy of my bloated boobs! hahaha!
5:55 pm
I will just be my cutie, carinoso and caring self
me: so which one is that? strutting with ostentatious display of feathers?
5:57 pm
Strutting with no clothes
me: ew!
5:59 pm
Cong ** and **** said matapang ka raw kahit may gunshot
me: what does that mean? nagpasundo nga ako eh.:)
6 pm
Matapang daw kayo ni ****
me: hahahaha...
me: curious. when you leave the house, nasasabika ba where you're going and what time you'll be back? wondering...
[call]: yes. i give an idea of what time i'll get home. when i cannot make it on time, i text to give her an estimate. me: that's nice of you.
9:35 pm
Sorry. No batt. I charge my phone everynight except saturday night. i drain my batt on sunday. I love you very much too
me: ok... i don't know what you're talking about. and draining your batt, who told you to do that?
9:57 pm
Para longer life ang batt. I miss you too
me: who said that? and may i just point out, gthat for someone who spends so mcuh, you're penny pinching on your batter at the expense of your availability to people? namely me? :)
me: I also forgot to point out that a batt cant cost you more than a couple of thousand bucks. but u cant put a price on the time you have w me?!? hahahaha...
10:15 pm
I miss you too
me:so non-responsive! move to strike.
10:16 pm
I love you too. June 19, 2008
me: can you please text me something conversational? :)
10:P18 pm
I promise to charge my phone everyday. Im solooking forward to se you tom.
me: that's better. :) meds? You flipping channels na?
10:25 pm
Tooks meds. Watching rocky channel 51. Ikaw?
me: blogging. new daily habit.
10:29 pm
See, you horoscope agrees with your revelation
me: i told j to clear out. tha needed saying for years... no revelation there. what talking about? :)
10:34 pm
Revelation that you love me
me: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?! :) :) :)
10:43 pm
What time will you be in office tom
me: will try to be early. maybe 8?
10:47 pm
Ok. Sleep na ko. Night. I love you princess
me: ok. night bert
10:48 pm
:)
Saturday, June 28, 2008
28 June 2008
me: you haven't told me what the rest of your day is like
11:44 am
meeting til around 3pm. Dinner with jean's friends. ikaw?
me: Football. Then mom's house. Will take javi to time zone. Wax lady evening.
3:56 pm
pls call
me: will clean up first. Will text you when am done.
4:48 pm
ok
me: I'm sunburned.
5:04 pm
I got my suit that goes with maong. Pogi
me: Ok. I'm tired. Will go to sleep.
5:08 pm
Ok. Love you
me: Amabit inis with you now.
6:16 pm
Sorry. Dont be inis na
me: I am. Really.
me: 5 texts, 2 short phone calls, and 1and a half hours under the sun. That's all you gave me today after almost a day of now talking.
6:17 pm
I love you. June 28, 2008
me: Am so inis, you last text didn't even make me smile. And you're not even taking me seriously.
6:24 pm
I am really sorry. I know this wil not make up for anything but my going to atneo meant more than 1.5 hours to me.
me: Yes. I am thankful you wet. That made me happy. But am still inis. You basicaly ignored me the rest of the day.
6:24 pm
And i do love you
me: I am so not feeling it right now.
6:26 pm
No excuses but stressful meetings andi was trying to call you for more than an hour
me: That was past 4. Not even a text. I know ambeing unreasonable. But this is how i feel. Am really inis.
6:29
Sorry
8:24 pm
What are you doing?
Me: Shopping
8:25 pm
For me?
me: No.
8:26 pm
I can feel you are still inis. Sorry.
10:16 pm
Hello princess
me: Hi.
10:40 pm
Inis ka pa sa kin?
me: yes
10:41 pm
Where are you? What are you doing?
me: Galleria. Waching movie.
11:42 pm
What are you watching? Sino kasama mo?
me: Hulk. The boys.
11:46 pm
I wilsleep na princess. Night. Sorry again. Wil make it up. I love you
me: Good night.
11:44 am
meeting til around 3pm. Dinner with jean's friends. ikaw?
me: Football. Then mom's house. Will take javi to time zone. Wax lady evening.
3:56 pm
pls call
me: will clean up first. Will text you when am done.
4:48 pm
ok
me: I'm sunburned.
5:04 pm
I got my suit that goes with maong. Pogi
me: Ok. I'm tired. Will go to sleep.
5:08 pm
Ok. Love you
me: Amabit inis with you now.
6:16 pm
Sorry. Dont be inis na
me: I am. Really.
me: 5 texts, 2 short phone calls, and 1and a half hours under the sun. That's all you gave me today after almost a day of now talking.
6:17 pm
I love you. June 28, 2008
me: Am so inis, you last text didn't even make me smile. And you're not even taking me seriously.
6:24 pm
I am really sorry. I know this wil not make up for anything but my going to atneo meant more than 1.5 hours to me.
me: Yes. I am thankful you wet. That made me happy. But am still inis. You basicaly ignored me the rest of the day.
6:24 pm
And i do love you
me: I am so not feeling it right now.
6:26 pm
No excuses but stressful meetings andi was trying to call you for more than an hour
me: That was past 4. Not even a text. I know ambeing unreasonable. But this is how i feel. Am really inis.
6:29
Sorry
8:24 pm
What are you doing?
Me: Shopping
8:25 pm
For me?
me: No.
8:26 pm
I can feel you are still inis. Sorry.
10:16 pm
Hello princess
me: Hi.
10:40 pm
Inis ka pa sa kin?
me: yes
10:41 pm
Where are you? What are you doing?
me: Galleria. Waching movie.
11:42 pm
What are you watching? Sino kasama mo?
me: Hulk. The boys.
11:46 pm
I wilsleep na princess. Night. Sorry again. Wil make it up. I love you
me: Good night.
Friday, June 27, 2008
27 July 2008
me: was re-reading my texts, and realized that this particular text may have come out wrong: "ok. point is, i would have never gotten myself that. and i love what i have now. and you bought it for me. i would have kept the pink one, but you said it was okay to change!" may i please clarify what i wanted to say? what i meant to say was that i would have never gotten myself cartier glasses. for a variety of reasons. the most obvious one being cost. the most i spent on sunglasses was 7k on a pair of fendi glasses i bought in college and that i still have. and i agree with sab. the pink ones you chose were very pretty. obviously the good stuff, as sab aptly put. and when i tried it on to compare, it was cute. looked better on me with my hair down and was really thinking, pink na lang. that was the point of the hassignment. for you to choose. not for me to point out. but sab said, pink is nice. but its not me. and she said you would want me to have something me. glassess are very personal, she says. its on your face. it should be you. and i as convinced. now, i have sunglasses that i cant afford becuase you thought i was worth it. again proving to me that you don't fudge when you call me your princess. :) :) :)
me: on your way na?
6:25 am
home pa. morning
me: ok. what time you leaving?
6:28 am
7am. miss mo ko?
me: kanina pa ako gising. 530. had discussion with martin. :) so don't fish.
6:31 am
i'm not fishing, i'm asking
me: what do you mean by miss? want to be with you or just naisip ka?
6:34 am
thinking of me is a given. being with me?
me:so presumptious. really. cge na nga. yes. thanks for cupcakes, flashdrive and glasses
6:39 am
what is your schedule?
me: psalm
6:38 am
ok. willl take a bath na.
me: ok. focus on bath. not me.
6:41 am
will try
me: see? you asked for my schedule but you haven't told me yours. all i know is you'll be in batangas till noon. thats what you forgot to do yesterday.
7:07 am
oops. Office in the afternoon. will pick up jessie in airport in evening.:
me: oh. she's back. :)
7:13 am
tonight then sunday to thailand
me: yikes. just 2 nights here.
7:15 am
yes. then 2 weeks out
me: yeah nga. you mentioned that. at least she came home in between.
[call]
me: maybe i'm just being hormonal. or am bagong gising. but am thinking maybe we should try to bee just friends. try lang. if not, then hindi. we can go back to being as we are now am thinkng kc,now, we can still be friends. konti pa, it might get too complicated for us to be friends after.
[call]
me: where you na?
[call]
me: too bad for you. i look so cute today. very fresh and mabango. tsk tsk. you'll miss it. :) imagine mo na lang. :)
10:36 am
i want to kiss you all over
me: too bad... :) imagine mo na lang.
10:43 am
having tour of airport
me: office ka na?
[call]
me: don't you have class?
[call]
dumb game i decided to play. chicken. no contact. let's see who blinks first. thought he'd give up after a couple of hours. its been 10 hours and 38 minutes and no call or text. man is determined. crap. i think he's trying to prove a point. yikes. this might just backfire on me. :( :(
me: on your way na?
6:25 am
home pa. morning
me: ok. what time you leaving?
6:28 am
7am. miss mo ko?
me: kanina pa ako gising. 530. had discussion with martin. :) so don't fish.
6:31 am
i'm not fishing, i'm asking
me: what do you mean by miss? want to be with you or just naisip ka?
6:34 am
thinking of me is a given. being with me?
me:so presumptious. really. cge na nga. yes. thanks for cupcakes, flashdrive and glasses
6:39 am
what is your schedule?
me: psalm
6:38 am
ok. willl take a bath na.
me: ok. focus on bath. not me.
6:41 am
will try
me: see? you asked for my schedule but you haven't told me yours. all i know is you'll be in batangas till noon. thats what you forgot to do yesterday.
7:07 am
oops. Office in the afternoon. will pick up jessie in airport in evening.:
me: oh. she's back. :)
7:13 am
tonight then sunday to thailand
me: yikes. just 2 nights here.
7:15 am
yes. then 2 weeks out
me: yeah nga. you mentioned that. at least she came home in between.
[call]
me: maybe i'm just being hormonal. or am bagong gising. but am thinking maybe we should try to bee just friends. try lang. if not, then hindi. we can go back to being as we are now am thinkng kc,now, we can still be friends. konti pa, it might get too complicated for us to be friends after.
[call]
me: where you na?
[call]
me: too bad for you. i look so cute today. very fresh and mabango. tsk tsk. you'll miss it. :) imagine mo na lang. :)
10:36 am
i want to kiss you all over
me: too bad... :) imagine mo na lang.
10:43 am
having tour of airport
me: office ka na?
[call]
me: don't you have class?
[call]
dumb game i decided to play. chicken. no contact. let's see who blinks first. thought he'd give up after a couple of hours. its been 10 hours and 38 minutes and no call or text. man is determined. crap. i think he's trying to prove a point. yikes. this might just backfire on me. :( :(
sundo
kay tagal kong sinusuyod ang buong mundo
para hanapin
para hanapin ka
nilibot ang distrito ng iyong lumbay
pupulutin
pupulutin ka
sinusundo kita
sinusundo
asahan mo
mula ngayon pag ibig ko'y sa iyo
asahan mo
mula ngayon pag ibig ko'y sa iyo
sa akin mo isabit ang pangarap mo
di kukulangin
ang ibibigay
isuko ang kaba tuluyan kang bumitaw
ika'y manalig
manalig ka
sinusundo kita
sinusundo
asahan mo
mula ngayon pag ibig ko'y sa iyo
asahan mo
mula ngayon pag ibig ko'y s iyo
handa na sa liwanag mo
sinuyod ang buong mundo
naghihintay sa iyong sundo
para hanapin
para hanapin ka
nilibot ang distrito ng iyong lumbay
pupulutin
pupulutin ka
sinusundo kita
sinusundo
asahan mo
mula ngayon pag ibig ko'y sa iyo
asahan mo
mula ngayon pag ibig ko'y sa iyo
sa akin mo isabit ang pangarap mo
di kukulangin
ang ibibigay
isuko ang kaba tuluyan kang bumitaw
ika'y manalig
manalig ka
sinusundo kita
sinusundo
asahan mo
mula ngayon pag ibig ko'y sa iyo
asahan mo
mula ngayon pag ibig ko'y s iyo
handa na sa liwanag mo
sinuyod ang buong mundo
naghihintay sa iyong sundo
i am the luckiest
I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here
And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
What if I'd been born fifty years before you
In a house on a street where you lived?
Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike
Would I know?
And in a white sea of eyes
I see one pair that I recognize
And I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you
Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties
And one day passed away in his sleep
And his wife; she stayed for a couple of days
And passed away
I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong
That I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here
And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
What if I'd been born fifty years before you
In a house on a street where you lived?
Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike
Would I know?
And in a white sea of eyes
I see one pair that I recognize
And I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you
Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties
And one day passed away in his sleep
And his wife; she stayed for a couple of days
And passed away
I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong
That I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
Thursday, June 26, 2008
26 June 2008
6:48 am
Hello
me: Hi. Tired. You in office na? I don't know what your day is like :-(
me: Hello? You there?
[phone call]
me:First cigarette. Breakfast. :)
7:50 am
Ok princess HOH (head over heels)
me: Ew! Ikaw yun!
me: Am I your favorite lawyer? :)
[phone call]
me: so am i your favorite? You know there's only 1 acceptable answer. And you also know i HATE fudging. :) so if i'm not your favorite, you're in trouble. :)
9:13 am
You are
me: better be true!:)
9:17 am
Isa lang naman ang concern ko with you
me: I KNOW! I KNOW! Am hiding under a rock right now. I asked for it. :)
me: I think i left my brush again.
11:04 AM
You are getting old
me: don't you check before you leave? you're the older one. you're supposed to be responsible... that's my 2nd hairbrush... :-(
11:09 am
Sorry. I did 1 pass
me: no brush? am so annoyed with myself. I feel naked without a brush. How was your presentation? You on your way back?
11:11 am
As usual, great performance. On my way back
me: haha... did you crack that pinoy challenge joke? please say no...
11:14 am
I did. I always do
me: did they laugh? figured its part of your script. :) ok lang. oldies like you will laugh... :):)
11:16 am
They laughed. Where you?
me: starbucks in shang. waiting for sab. using my cheap ass computer :) so cute, even if its cheap ass. Like my notebook. and my janilyn shoes. :)
11:17 am
Cheap ass computer from me
me: yup. :) and it still cute. its 16.5k. its a cheap ass computer. but really cue. thanks sd.
11:21 am
Love mo ko?
me: ok. where did that come from? are you projecting again? you know what i want you to get me, and yes, i'm being demanding. i want a bigger flash drive. the one i have is only 2gb and its almost full. i think now there's 4 or 6gb. buy for me today. pass by trinoma or something. :) me lang. don't buy for the others. ok? :)
11:33 am
ok. can i get 1 for me?
me: was i too demanding? can i take it back? i feel jahe now. :-(
me: why are you ignoring me? i'm having an anxiety attack. sab is taking forever to get here. and you're ignoring me! i can't work cause i can't connect to the internet and i brought the wrong envelope of papers and i can't call you! :-(:-( :-(
11:53 am
Sorry. May kasabay ako sa car. Madaldal eh. Miss you
me: ok. who's with you? :-( you don't reply to my texts :-(
11:57 am
1 board member who is ateneo law batchmate.
me: how annoying! where are you dropping him off?
11:59 am
Her off. At NHA
me: how annoying! am being a brat.
12:14 am
Sorry cant talk properly
me: i am soooooo weepy!
12:24 pm
Dont be na
me: i have access. Pray it doesn't get disconnected... i'm so not ok today.
12:28 pm
I love you
me: :) :) but you can't talk to me!!!
12:28 pm
Sorry. Will call as soon as i drop her of
me: :-( but that's later pa :-(
12:30 pm
20mins. What are you wearing
me: is the daughter of tet a director for sbma? sab is here and she says her sister in law is.
12:38 pm
I didn't check the names. Young ba?
me: she's 40. we're at cartier. :)
1:15 pm
Got your flashdrive
1:19 pm
Im eating at fastfood, trinoma
me: what are you eating? i can't imagine you in a fastfood place. especially in your suit.
1:23 pm
Naka casual lang ako. Eating by myself. Spareribs toppings
me: casual for a board meeting?
1:25 pm
With geox jacket and shirt tucked in. Out of town kasi
me: ok... sab says the glasses you chose were VERY NICE, "muy bonito," the good stuff. but... its something her mother in law would wear! so i exchanged it for a similar style, platinum,not gold, black lenses, not pink. but square, frameless pa rin. sorry...?
1:35 pm
Its ok. That why i got gift receipt. Yes, im old.
me: hahaha.... 70 year old lady at the table beside us is wearing the exact same pair. No kidding. thanks sd.
1:40 pm
Welcome. I hope that next time you will like the gift aside from giver
me: ano ka ba! you're making me feel guilty. you're stressing isabel out. we can't eat.
1:47 pm
That was not meant to make you feel guilty. Ano ba kayo. There will be definitely a next time /gift. Eat well
me: ok. point is, i would have never gotten myself that. and i love what i have now. and you bought it for me. i would have kept the pink one, but you said it was ok to change it!
1:53 pm
Again, it is ok
me: where are you? will have my 2nd cig in a bit
[call]
me: july 2
3:15 pm
Thank you princess
me: i finished by cig na. may i just say that its nice when you spoil me. makes me feel like i'm worth all the attention and the effort and the expense. makes me feel every inch a princess. but am a working princess. will work now. i still can't say it, but know that am thinking it. :)
3:22 pm
I love you too. June 26,2008. I know what i am talking about :)
me: huh?! :)
3:42 pm
Miss you. Nap muna ko sa car. On my way to fort. I have 4.30pm
me: ok
me: 3rd cig. samahan ko cousin ko. ok?
4:24 pm
Ok. Pancake house na ko fort
me: who's your meeting with. parang i didn't know about this 430...
[call]
5:37 pm
Ganda mo naman. I like your glasses
me: you bought them. thank you.:) you know what? this will make you happy. i gave away my pack. quitting. for now.
me: what are the rules, no weird looks i don't even know what that last frown was about.
me: i just gave away my cigarettes and you reciprocate by overeating. good job. i'm not talking to you. seriously. and don't react. there are others.
me: hi
9:02 pm
Hello. Really wanted to hug and kiss you
me: ya. me 2. was tempted to hold your hand under the table. thanks for the cupcakes and the glasses and the flash disk. :) am so feeling am a princess :)
me: am thinking it,but i really can't say it
9:04 pm
You're my princess
me: am so lucky
me: i enjoyed the walk. even if my feet hurt. :)
9:44 pm
Wanted to hold your hand
me: yeah. or i could have held your arm. can we please fly out? hongkong. offpeak. cge na. please?
9:57 pm
Call you after meeting
me: ok.
me: plus, wag mo palampasin yun mga hirit ni ria kanina.
[call]
Me: good night bert 1.5 :)
11:22 pm
Akala ko ba bert 2 na?
Me: downgraded ka because of crispy pata. Nothing is ever without consequence. :) ako nga, 3.5 out of 5… d ako nagrereklamo… :)
11:25
Ok. Night. I love you
Me: meds? Goodnight. Dream of me. wholesome lang. :)
11:30 pm
Night. Will try na wholesome lang
Me: there’s something you forgot to do today. And its not to tell me you love me. I hope you figure it out by the time you wake up. Before its too late.
11:35 pm
Hmm.. Isip ko. Night.
Me: night
Hello
me: Hi. Tired. You in office na? I don't know what your day is like :-(
me: Hello? You there?
[phone call]
me:First cigarette. Breakfast. :)
7:50 am
Ok princess HOH (head over heels)
me: Ew! Ikaw yun!
me: Am I your favorite lawyer? :)
[phone call]
me: so am i your favorite? You know there's only 1 acceptable answer. And you also know i HATE fudging. :) so if i'm not your favorite, you're in trouble. :)
9:13 am
You are
me: better be true!:)
9:17 am
Isa lang naman ang concern ko with you
me: I KNOW! I KNOW! Am hiding under a rock right now. I asked for it. :)
me: I think i left my brush again.
11:04 AM
You are getting old
me: don't you check before you leave? you're the older one. you're supposed to be responsible... that's my 2nd hairbrush... :-(
11:09 am
Sorry. I did 1 pass
me: no brush? am so annoyed with myself. I feel naked without a brush. How was your presentation? You on your way back?
11:11 am
As usual, great performance. On my way back
me: haha... did you crack that pinoy challenge joke? please say no...
11:14 am
I did. I always do
me: did they laugh? figured its part of your script. :) ok lang. oldies like you will laugh... :):)
11:16 am
They laughed. Where you?
me: starbucks in shang. waiting for sab. using my cheap ass computer :) so cute, even if its cheap ass. Like my notebook. and my janilyn shoes. :)
11:17 am
Cheap ass computer from me
me: yup. :) and it still cute. its 16.5k. its a cheap ass computer. but really cue. thanks sd.
11:21 am
Love mo ko?
me: ok. where did that come from? are you projecting again? you know what i want you to get me, and yes, i'm being demanding. i want a bigger flash drive. the one i have is only 2gb and its almost full. i think now there's 4 or 6gb. buy for me today. pass by trinoma or something. :) me lang. don't buy for the others. ok? :)
11:33 am
ok. can i get 1 for me?
me: was i too demanding? can i take it back? i feel jahe now. :-(
me: why are you ignoring me? i'm having an anxiety attack. sab is taking forever to get here. and you're ignoring me! i can't work cause i can't connect to the internet and i brought the wrong envelope of papers and i can't call you! :-(:-( :-(
11:53 am
Sorry. May kasabay ako sa car. Madaldal eh. Miss you
me: ok. who's with you? :-( you don't reply to my texts :-(
11:57 am
1 board member who is ateneo law batchmate.
me: how annoying! where are you dropping him off?
11:59 am
Her off. At NHA
me: how annoying! am being a brat.
12:14 am
Sorry cant talk properly
me: i am soooooo weepy!
12:24 pm
Dont be na
me: i have access. Pray it doesn't get disconnected... i'm so not ok today.
12:28 pm
I love you
me: :) :) but you can't talk to me!!!
12:28 pm
Sorry. Will call as soon as i drop her of
me: :-( but that's later pa :-(
12:30 pm
20mins. What are you wearing
me: is the daughter of tet a director for sbma? sab is here and she says her sister in law is.
12:38 pm
I didn't check the names. Young ba?
me: she's 40. we're at cartier. :)
1:15 pm
Got your flashdrive
1:19 pm
Im eating at fastfood, trinoma
me: what are you eating? i can't imagine you in a fastfood place. especially in your suit.
1:23 pm
Naka casual lang ako. Eating by myself. Spareribs toppings
me: casual for a board meeting?
1:25 pm
With geox jacket and shirt tucked in. Out of town kasi
me: ok... sab says the glasses you chose were VERY NICE, "muy bonito," the good stuff. but... its something her mother in law would wear! so i exchanged it for a similar style, platinum,not gold, black lenses, not pink. but square, frameless pa rin. sorry...?
1:35 pm
Its ok. That why i got gift receipt. Yes, im old.
me: hahaha.... 70 year old lady at the table beside us is wearing the exact same pair. No kidding. thanks sd.
1:40 pm
Welcome. I hope that next time you will like the gift aside from giver
me: ano ka ba! you're making me feel guilty. you're stressing isabel out. we can't eat.
1:47 pm
That was not meant to make you feel guilty. Ano ba kayo. There will be definitely a next time /gift. Eat well
me: ok. point is, i would have never gotten myself that. and i love what i have now. and you bought it for me. i would have kept the pink one, but you said it was ok to change it!
1:53 pm
Again, it is ok
me: where are you? will have my 2nd cig in a bit
[call]
me: july 2
3:15 pm
Thank you princess
me: i finished by cig na. may i just say that its nice when you spoil me. makes me feel like i'm worth all the attention and the effort and the expense. makes me feel every inch a princess. but am a working princess. will work now. i still can't say it, but know that am thinking it. :)
3:22 pm
I love you too. June 26,2008. I know what i am talking about :)
me: huh?! :)
3:42 pm
Miss you. Nap muna ko sa car. On my way to fort. I have 4.30pm
me: ok
me: 3rd cig. samahan ko cousin ko. ok?
4:24 pm
Ok. Pancake house na ko fort
me: who's your meeting with. parang i didn't know about this 430...
[call]
5:37 pm
Ganda mo naman. I like your glasses
me: you bought them. thank you.:) you know what? this will make you happy. i gave away my pack. quitting. for now.
me: what are the rules, no weird looks i don't even know what that last frown was about.
me: i just gave away my cigarettes and you reciprocate by overeating. good job. i'm not talking to you. seriously. and don't react. there are others.
me: hi
9:02 pm
Hello. Really wanted to hug and kiss you
me: ya. me 2. was tempted to hold your hand under the table. thanks for the cupcakes and the glasses and the flash disk. :) am so feeling am a princess :)
me: am thinking it,but i really can't say it
9:04 pm
You're my princess
me: am so lucky
me: i enjoyed the walk. even if my feet hurt. :)
9:44 pm
Wanted to hold your hand
me: yeah. or i could have held your arm. can we please fly out? hongkong. offpeak. cge na. please?
9:57 pm
Call you after meeting
me: ok.
me: plus, wag mo palampasin yun mga hirit ni ria kanina.
[call]
Me: good night bert 1.5 :)
11:22 pm
Akala ko ba bert 2 na?
Me: downgraded ka because of crispy pata. Nothing is ever without consequence. :) ako nga, 3.5 out of 5… d ako nagrereklamo… :)
11:25
Ok. Night. I love you
Me: meds? Goodnight. Dream of me. wholesome lang. :)
11:30 pm
Night. Will try na wholesome lang
Me: there’s something you forgot to do today. And its not to tell me you love me. I hope you figure it out by the time you wake up. Before its too late.
11:35 pm
Hmm.. Isip ko. Night.
Me: night
sms
6/17/08; 6:16:02 pm
Clear na. I love you. I love talking to you. I love how you tease. I love how you take care of me.
6/17/08; 6:24:01 pm
Ok. Basta, i love you.
6/17/08; 10:16:08 pm
Night love
6/18/08; 10:36:42 pm
I love you princess
6/19/08; 6:33:44 am
I love you
6/21/08; 10:48:13 pm
i love you princess. Night
Me: You know why i asked you to tell me you love me? You texted me you love me three straight days. then you didn't 1 day. you'd tell me, but you didn't text me. today would have been the 2nd day in a row. when i look back at my texts, i want to see consecutive dates. :)
6/22/08; 9:18:49 am
I love you my princess. June 22, 2008
6/22/08; 12:37:21 pm
Ok love
6/23/08; 12:05:43 am
wala talaga akong masabi. Mali na naman ako Kulang na naman ako. I am sorry. I love you
6/23/08 aftertoo much alcohol in the afternoon, i emailed him this:
That hint of irritability you're feeling doesn't have to take over your entire day -- but it might, if you don't get rid of it. How? Exercise, darling, exercise. You'll work out your frustrations and do something special for the person who shares your life -- and the effects of your moods.
You're extremely irritated, and you want to make sure that the opposition knows about it. Fine -- but no ultimatums. Not when a plain old dirty look will do just fine.
that was my horoscope. no kidding.
that was probably the most unproductive conversation we've ever had. how can we possibly discuss anything that way? in a lobby full of people! with 1 in 10 people shaking your hand. i want you to think of all this. me, you, the situation, our families. yes. we can end it. today. why wait till tragedy strikes. or, as you said, we can not get caught. but the second 1 just leaves the same questions unanswered. what am i ba? am i just a distraction to you? if the answer is yes, then say so. at least i know which game were playing and what rules to follow. am i, as i often think of you, the "bakit ngayon ka lang dumating" type? the great could have been? if so, then lets deal with that. yes, its the marilyn v camilla question.
honestly, the thing that weighs most heavily on me is the fact that my marriage has reached this pitiful state because i wasn't the priority. i was always 2nd fiddle to basketball, to barkada, to poker, to kids, to other women. ironically, my escape from the damned thing was you. where my being second fiddle is institutionalized. do you realize how that breaks me?!?
i'm not asking for answers.i'm not asking you to profess your undying love for me. that's just plain stupid and deluded. but i need to know what game to play. what the rules are. that isn't so hard? if i'm a diversion, i'll act like one. if i'm not, then i'll adjust.
you opened the can of worms. and set the issues free. they were fine under that thick rug. yes. i blame you. you shouldn't have asked questions that are taboo. made me ask questions too. questions which aren't allowed. and made me hurt at the answers i got.
the last song playing in the lobby was "hiram" by zsazsa padilla, the ultimate querida song sang by the quintessntial querida. following closely at the heels of "bakit ngayon ka lang." what a cruel karmic joke that was.
his reply, throuh sms:
6/23/08; 6:12:53 pm
I love you princess. June 23, 2008
Me: what does that mean? i mean, i know what it means, but in the context of my kilometric text, what does that mean?
his reply through sms:
6/23/08; 6:26:05 pm
Im professing my undying love
6/23/08; 7:34:48 pm
My "i love you" then is the same as now. Whatever happens, i will always love you.
me: what void did i fill in your life?
his reply, through sms:
6/23/08; 11:1548 pm
1. Real talk, 2. being me when im with you, 3. Being cared for all aspects
my reply: hey! that's my list! no copying! but for me, add 4. being appreciated for who and what i am.
me: you won't get past 1.5 (out of 3) without a 3.5 carats on my finger
his reply, through sms:
6/23/08; 11:28:37 pmn
Granted. Meme na ako ha. Night princess. I love you almost june 24, 08
me: good night bert 1.5 have you done your bi-monthly thing? you said that you would do it once every 2 months. that was 2 months ago. you're about due.
his reply, through sms
1st, thanks for calling me bert 1.5. That meant a lot to me. 2nd, while it is "due", we have not. I dont see it happening soon That was awkward. Haha
6/24/08; 9:39:30 pm
I miss you. I love you
6/24/08; 11:09:06 pm
Padon my kulit. Just want to say this before i sleep - I LOVE YOU PRINCESS
6?24/08; 11:11:23 PM
Isa pa. I love you. June 24, 2008
6/25/08; 4:17:15 pm
I love you my princess. June 25, 2008
6/25/08; 9:21:34 pm
Night. Love you
Clear na. I love you. I love talking to you. I love how you tease. I love how you take care of me.
6/17/08; 6:24:01 pm
Ok. Basta, i love you.
6/17/08; 10:16:08 pm
Night love
6/18/08; 10:36:42 pm
I love you princess
6/19/08; 6:33:44 am
I love you
6/21/08; 10:48:13 pm
i love you princess. Night
Me: You know why i asked you to tell me you love me? You texted me you love me three straight days. then you didn't 1 day. you'd tell me, but you didn't text me. today would have been the 2nd day in a row. when i look back at my texts, i want to see consecutive dates. :)
6/22/08; 9:18:49 am
I love you my princess. June 22, 2008
6/22/08; 12:37:21 pm
Ok love
6/23/08; 12:05:43 am
wala talaga akong masabi. Mali na naman ako Kulang na naman ako. I am sorry. I love you
6/23/08 aftertoo much alcohol in the afternoon, i emailed him this:
That hint of irritability you're feeling doesn't have to take over your entire day -- but it might, if you don't get rid of it. How? Exercise, darling, exercise. You'll work out your frustrations and do something special for the person who shares your life -- and the effects of your moods.
You're extremely irritated, and you want to make sure that the opposition knows about it. Fine -- but no ultimatums. Not when a plain old dirty look will do just fine.
that was my horoscope. no kidding.
that was probably the most unproductive conversation we've ever had. how can we possibly discuss anything that way? in a lobby full of people! with 1 in 10 people shaking your hand. i want you to think of all this. me, you, the situation, our families. yes. we can end it. today. why wait till tragedy strikes. or, as you said, we can not get caught. but the second 1 just leaves the same questions unanswered. what am i ba? am i just a distraction to you? if the answer is yes, then say so. at least i know which game were playing and what rules to follow. am i, as i often think of you, the "bakit ngayon ka lang dumating" type? the great could have been? if so, then lets deal with that. yes, its the marilyn v camilla question.
honestly, the thing that weighs most heavily on me is the fact that my marriage has reached this pitiful state because i wasn't the priority. i was always 2nd fiddle to basketball, to barkada, to poker, to kids, to other women. ironically, my escape from the damned thing was you. where my being second fiddle is institutionalized. do you realize how that breaks me?!?
i'm not asking for answers.i'm not asking you to profess your undying love for me. that's just plain stupid and deluded. but i need to know what game to play. what the rules are. that isn't so hard? if i'm a diversion, i'll act like one. if i'm not, then i'll adjust.
you opened the can of worms. and set the issues free. they were fine under that thick rug. yes. i blame you. you shouldn't have asked questions that are taboo. made me ask questions too. questions which aren't allowed. and made me hurt at the answers i got.
the last song playing in the lobby was "hiram" by zsazsa padilla, the ultimate querida song sang by the quintessntial querida. following closely at the heels of "bakit ngayon ka lang." what a cruel karmic joke that was.
his reply, throuh sms:
6/23/08; 6:12:53 pm
I love you princess. June 23, 2008
Me: what does that mean? i mean, i know what it means, but in the context of my kilometric text, what does that mean?
his reply through sms:
6/23/08; 6:26:05 pm
Im professing my undying love
6/23/08; 7:34:48 pm
My "i love you" then is the same as now. Whatever happens, i will always love you.
me: what void did i fill in your life?
his reply, through sms:
6/23/08; 11:1548 pm
1. Real talk, 2. being me when im with you, 3. Being cared for all aspects
my reply: hey! that's my list! no copying! but for me, add 4. being appreciated for who and what i am.
me: you won't get past 1.5 (out of 3) without a 3.5 carats on my finger
his reply, through sms:
6/23/08; 11:28:37 pmn
Granted. Meme na ako ha. Night princess. I love you almost june 24, 08
me: good night bert 1.5 have you done your bi-monthly thing? you said that you would do it once every 2 months. that was 2 months ago. you're about due.
his reply, through sms
1st, thanks for calling me bert 1.5. That meant a lot to me. 2nd, while it is "due", we have not. I dont see it happening soon That was awkward. Haha
6/24/08; 9:39:30 pm
I miss you. I love you
6/24/08; 11:09:06 pm
Padon my kulit. Just want to say this before i sleep - I LOVE YOU PRINCESS
6?24/08; 11:11:23 PM
Isa pa. I love you. June 24, 2008
6/25/08; 4:17:15 pm
I love you my princess. June 25, 2008
6/25/08; 9:21:34 pm
Night. Love you
Monday, June 23, 2008
you're a texter
You know what else I like, that I appreciated extra today? That you spend time texting me. was talking to sab kanina and she asked, do you guys always text? I said, yeah. 30-40 texts (yes, I count) on the average. 60 if madaming pinaguusapan. 10 ona bad day. And she said, “wow. How nice to have that. “ yeah. How nice. you know what else? I think that the whole situation makes me appreciated things more, and not take too many things for granted. Hmmm…
Sunday, June 15, 2008
hypothetical
Dear **r*,
2 months and some odd days down the road, boundaries have indeed been broken. things have progressed way beyond the point i thought it would. largely because of your very expensive (at least 30K worth) ligaw mode. that was some week. you made me smile, and really gave me reason to smile, to want to smile, even if i was in a different country all together.
in hindsight, the things i said the last night before i left for manila, i was thinking WAY too far ahead. but you know what, they're still the same concerns i have now. time hasn't eliminated those issues, in fact, they're now more relevant because what we have has progressed so much.
boundaries. yes. they've been breached. as a testament to that, i haven't been thinking of boundaries since i last wrote you. in fact, boundaries have been renamed to "issues." informally, we've agreed that boundaries, save for one, are no longer there. and that final boundary, well, that's the main "issue."
early on, on sake night, you told me you loved me. hmm... then, i thought, TALAGA?? ANG TANDA TANDA MO NA to be spewing out that word like it means nothing. i had my doubts. in fact,i had my doubts you knew what the real "issue" was until last night. when you spelled it out, "how can you love me when you shouldn't." so there it is. the issue. the statement i've been struggling with. a condensed version of all i feel. the irony that is. the sum of all i feel. how can you love me when you know you shouldn't? how can i possibly love you when i know this can't be?!?
but you know what, regardless of whether you love me in the sense i understand the word, or in the shallow sense i suspect you do, fact is, i have fallen in love with you. and yes, I LOVE YOU.
*sigh* so there. i said it. even if its just to myself, in a blog no one will ever read.
i have not changed my image of you. you are still the great "sayang" in my life. the man i ought to have married, had we been born nearer in time. hahaha... when you got married, i was only 16, in 1st year high school. i would've wanted to say, i do want to say, sana hinintay mo ako. sana nga. we would've met, fallen in love, and who knows.
yes, yes. its such a wide eyed littl girl look i get when i think about the hypothetical. but the hypothetical is just too provocative. let me indulge for a while.
if we were together, if we could be together, i think we'd be happy. we'd have our issues, but i think there would be a real chance of having one of those deliriously happy marriages with you. yes, there will be hiccups. but in the end, we'd be happy.
on the shallow side, i think we'd make a great couple. i'd make a perfect evita to your juan. hmmm... every great politico needs a beautiful woman (hehehe) on his arm. the perfect accessory. no, i am not demeaning myself. i just think that i would be the perfect complement to you.
you and i have induled in snippets of the hypothetical. what i'd do if you had a particularly bad day and i'd like to make you feel better. or, essentially, what we'd do if we shared a home, and it was me you were coming home to, and it was you who was coming home to me. yes. delicious thoughts. but not in a fobidden way, but in a longing way. at least for me. longing for that kind of happiness. the kind i never really had, and am doomed never to have. :( yes, reality check. you come home to someone else, and well, someone shares my home. i can't say he comes home to me. in truth, we just share a roof.
*r*, i like you. in the friendship sense. i like talking to you. i like being your sounding board. yes, i get inis when you talk sometimes. but that's what's so great about how i feel. its real. you are not some perfect man. naiinis din ako sa iyo. nakokornihan din ako. nababaduyan din ako with some of the things you say. but the overrriding feeling is, i like you. super super a lot.
and yes, i do love you. in a way i thought i'd never feel again. i a true, "forever" way. the biggest irony of "us" is that, i can see myself grow old with you. but the issue remains. so that is so not on the table. but oh, how i wish it were. delicious thought. enough to keep me busog.
i love you **r*. so much, i'm bursting, in large part because i can never tell you that i do. to verbalize it, well, i can't handle that. so i'l just tell you that i do, here, where you can never see it. i love you bert. grabe. i miss you constantly. i think about you constantly. when i wake up, before i sleep. when i'm working. constantly. i yearn to make what i have with you complete. i want to have a "public" aspect to us. which is why i've been lately obsessed with eating in public, and shopping. i guess i want people to know and see that i'm happy, with this man, you. i want the socil acceptability of what we have. gosh, that's your proverbial "suntok sa buwan". but still, i want people to accept it. but paano? not unless you erase the last 18 years of your life, and i'll erase the last 9 years of mine.
i love you bert. i hope that at some point, i'll be able to tell you how much i do. i hope that i'll be able to tell you i love you, because the issue has been overcome. what an awful thought. but delicious nonetheless.
2 months and some odd days down the road, boundaries have indeed been broken. things have progressed way beyond the point i thought it would. largely because of your very expensive (at least 30K worth) ligaw mode. that was some week. you made me smile, and really gave me reason to smile, to want to smile, even if i was in a different country all together.
in hindsight, the things i said the last night before i left for manila, i was thinking WAY too far ahead. but you know what, they're still the same concerns i have now. time hasn't eliminated those issues, in fact, they're now more relevant because what we have has progressed so much.
boundaries. yes. they've been breached. as a testament to that, i haven't been thinking of boundaries since i last wrote you. in fact, boundaries have been renamed to "issues." informally, we've agreed that boundaries, save for one, are no longer there. and that final boundary, well, that's the main "issue."
early on, on sake night, you told me you loved me. hmm... then, i thought, TALAGA?? ANG TANDA TANDA MO NA to be spewing out that word like it means nothing. i had my doubts. in fact,i had my doubts you knew what the real "issue" was until last night. when you spelled it out, "how can you love me when you shouldn't." so there it is. the issue. the statement i've been struggling with. a condensed version of all i feel. the irony that is. the sum of all i feel. how can you love me when you know you shouldn't? how can i possibly love you when i know this can't be?!?
but you know what, regardless of whether you love me in the sense i understand the word, or in the shallow sense i suspect you do, fact is, i have fallen in love with you. and yes, I LOVE YOU.
*sigh* so there. i said it. even if its just to myself, in a blog no one will ever read.
i have not changed my image of you. you are still the great "sayang" in my life. the man i ought to have married, had we been born nearer in time. hahaha... when you got married, i was only 16, in 1st year high school. i would've wanted to say, i do want to say, sana hinintay mo ako. sana nga. we would've met, fallen in love, and who knows.
yes, yes. its such a wide eyed littl girl look i get when i think about the hypothetical. but the hypothetical is just too provocative. let me indulge for a while.
if we were together, if we could be together, i think we'd be happy. we'd have our issues, but i think there would be a real chance of having one of those deliriously happy marriages with you. yes, there will be hiccups. but in the end, we'd be happy.
on the shallow side, i think we'd make a great couple. i'd make a perfect evita to your juan. hmmm... every great politico needs a beautiful woman (hehehe) on his arm. the perfect accessory. no, i am not demeaning myself. i just think that i would be the perfect complement to you.
you and i have induled in snippets of the hypothetical. what i'd do if you had a particularly bad day and i'd like to make you feel better. or, essentially, what we'd do if we shared a home, and it was me you were coming home to, and it was you who was coming home to me. yes. delicious thoughts. but not in a fobidden way, but in a longing way. at least for me. longing for that kind of happiness. the kind i never really had, and am doomed never to have. :( yes, reality check. you come home to someone else, and well, someone shares my home. i can't say he comes home to me. in truth, we just share a roof.
*r*, i like you. in the friendship sense. i like talking to you. i like being your sounding board. yes, i get inis when you talk sometimes. but that's what's so great about how i feel. its real. you are not some perfect man. naiinis din ako sa iyo. nakokornihan din ako. nababaduyan din ako with some of the things you say. but the overrriding feeling is, i like you. super super a lot.
and yes, i do love you. in a way i thought i'd never feel again. i a true, "forever" way. the biggest irony of "us" is that, i can see myself grow old with you. but the issue remains. so that is so not on the table. but oh, how i wish it were. delicious thought. enough to keep me busog.
i love you **r*. so much, i'm bursting, in large part because i can never tell you that i do. to verbalize it, well, i can't handle that. so i'l just tell you that i do, here, where you can never see it. i love you bert. grabe. i miss you constantly. i think about you constantly. when i wake up, before i sleep. when i'm working. constantly. i yearn to make what i have with you complete. i want to have a "public" aspect to us. which is why i've been lately obsessed with eating in public, and shopping. i guess i want people to know and see that i'm happy, with this man, you. i want the socil acceptability of what we have. gosh, that's your proverbial "suntok sa buwan". but still, i want people to accept it. but paano? not unless you erase the last 18 years of your life, and i'll erase the last 9 years of mine.
i love you bert. i hope that at some point, i'll be able to tell you how much i do. i hope that i'll be able to tell you i love you, because the issue has been overcome. what an awful thought. but delicious nonetheless.
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Resist the urge to whimper, whine or say 'if you loved me, you would.' Guilt may have worked on others, but it's not an attractive technique. How about brutal honesty instead?
This is what my horoscope said for saturday.
No, I didn’t want to make you feel guilty. I really was upset.
I’ve already whined and whimpered. This advice came too late.
Kanina ko pa iniisip. You didn’t really say anything wrong. Maybe your were sleepy and tired, and kakagising mo lang, and there I was, giving you drama you didn’t think you deserved.
So I whined, whimpered and overreacted. Sorry. I just don’t like being cut down. And you cut me down. I felt shamed by you for being needy.
In the course of my whining and whimpering, I came across important stuff din. So not all of the whining and whimpering was a loss.
What did I realize:
1. I’m extra sensitive and needy when I’m ovulating?
2. You can really hurt me
3. I’m more complicated that I thought
4. I have more emotional baggage than I realize
But we discussed all this already. So here’s new stuff I haven’t text you:
1. The thought of ending things drove me to bawl like a baby, but I stopped myself because I was uncomfortable with the thought that I let myself get attached to someone who can’t stay.
2. You don’t need extra drama in your life. You’re way too busy
3. I like having you around so I’ll try not to give you drama
4. At some point, I’ll be too needy that I can’t keep it to myself, and I’ll end up giving you drama anyway
5. When we get to that point, that will be the end. Nakita ko na how. At some point, di ko na mapipigilan hingiin ang di ko dapat hinggin. Which is your full time and complete attention. And the only course of action will be obvious.
So there. It’s a countdown. Hmmm…
I don’t really want to discuss this anymore. If you’re game, then I’m ready to see this thing run its natural course. Unless you decide that its an exercise in futility, so what for pa?
I’ll act like we didn’t have that discussion about you falling asleep on me again, so we can carry on like before. While I will not deny to myself we had that exchange, or that I felt the way I did, or that I emailed you this, I don’t want to discuss it. There’s really nothing to discuss.
Sorry for the drama. I won’t give you any more.
This is what my horoscope said for saturday.
No, I didn’t want to make you feel guilty. I really was upset.
I’ve already whined and whimpered. This advice came too late.
Kanina ko pa iniisip. You didn’t really say anything wrong. Maybe your were sleepy and tired, and kakagising mo lang, and there I was, giving you drama you didn’t think you deserved.
So I whined, whimpered and overreacted. Sorry. I just don’t like being cut down. And you cut me down. I felt shamed by you for being needy.
In the course of my whining and whimpering, I came across important stuff din. So not all of the whining and whimpering was a loss.
What did I realize:
1. I’m extra sensitive and needy when I’m ovulating?
2. You can really hurt me
3. I’m more complicated that I thought
4. I have more emotional baggage than I realize
But we discussed all this already. So here’s new stuff I haven’t text you:
1. The thought of ending things drove me to bawl like a baby, but I stopped myself because I was uncomfortable with the thought that I let myself get attached to someone who can’t stay.
2. You don’t need extra drama in your life. You’re way too busy
3. I like having you around so I’ll try not to give you drama
4. At some point, I’ll be too needy that I can’t keep it to myself, and I’ll end up giving you drama anyway
5. When we get to that point, that will be the end. Nakita ko na how. At some point, di ko na mapipigilan hingiin ang di ko dapat hinggin. Which is your full time and complete attention. And the only course of action will be obvious.
So there. It’s a countdown. Hmmm…
I don’t really want to discuss this anymore. If you’re game, then I’m ready to see this thing run its natural course. Unless you decide that its an exercise in futility, so what for pa?
I’ll act like we didn’t have that discussion about you falling asleep on me again, so we can carry on like before. While I will not deny to myself we had that exchange, or that I felt the way I did, or that I emailed you this, I don’t want to discuss it. There’s really nothing to discuss.
Sorry for the drama. I won’t give you any more.
Friday, June 6, 2008
Let me clarify.
As ***, you have the right to rely on your ***’s, and be stressed out when work comes at you from all directions.
As your ***, I will not complain when things get tough because that is part of my job. You have the right to rely on me and it is my duty to be reliable.
As a person, I don’t think I am precluded from being annoyed at my boss for being demanding, and from being tired and cranky. Ordinarily, my boss will not know I am annoyed or cranky. Maybe he will see that I am tired and cranky. But he ought not to know I am annoyed.
I told you I was annoyed as me. Not as ***. Why? Because you wanted to shift modes and expected me to be perky. That is not part of my job. That is a function of my personal relationship with you. Under that personal relationship, I am not obliged to be professional. Kaya nga personal eh. I am not obliged to pretend I’m perky when I’m not. As me, not as ***, I am telling you that I am tired, overwhelmed by work, and cranky. I have not slept, and I still cannot see the end of all the work. Plus I am worried about ****.
as my boss, strictly speaking, you ought not to be privy to all that.
Note that when we talk work, I try to be professional and not react like I’m annoyed. It was only when you shifted to a personal note that I told you how I felt. Okay? so don’t apologize. You have nothing to apologize for.
As ***, you have the right to rely on your ***’s, and be stressed out when work comes at you from all directions.
As your ***, I will not complain when things get tough because that is part of my job. You have the right to rely on me and it is my duty to be reliable.
As a person, I don’t think I am precluded from being annoyed at my boss for being demanding, and from being tired and cranky. Ordinarily, my boss will not know I am annoyed or cranky. Maybe he will see that I am tired and cranky. But he ought not to know I am annoyed.
I told you I was annoyed as me. Not as ***. Why? Because you wanted to shift modes and expected me to be perky. That is not part of my job. That is a function of my personal relationship with you. Under that personal relationship, I am not obliged to be professional. Kaya nga personal eh. I am not obliged to pretend I’m perky when I’m not. As me, not as ***, I am telling you that I am tired, overwhelmed by work, and cranky. I have not slept, and I still cannot see the end of all the work. Plus I am worried about ****.
as my boss, strictly speaking, you ought not to be privy to all that.
Note that when we talk work, I try to be professional and not react like I’m annoyed. It was only when you shifted to a personal note that I told you how I felt. Okay? so don’t apologize. You have nothing to apologize for.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
dont tell me what to do
by email:
And about you telling me not to get plastered…
Really, you should know better
1. I feel compelled to not do what you asked.
2. Possessiveness, or trying to control is not allowed in what we have.
3. I’m a big girl.
Before you get me wrong, I think its sweet that you don’t like the smoking, or the scoping out guys to buy me drinks. I’ve always taken possessiveness in stride. I think its endearing. I’m a secret traditionalist. I’ve always believed men should have a say in how their women act and in what they do. But that’s not allowed. Not between us. Issues. You cannot be possessive because you just can’t. and I can’t respond to that because if I do, I’d be fooling myself into thinking that we have rights to each other, which we don’t. issues.
So, you can look all disapproving when I have a cig or when I talk about drinking, but know that I won’t necessarily do as I’m told.
And about you telling me not to get plastered…
Really, you should know better
1. I feel compelled to not do what you asked.
2. Possessiveness, or trying to control is not allowed in what we have.
3. I’m a big girl.
Before you get me wrong, I think its sweet that you don’t like the smoking, or the scoping out guys to buy me drinks. I’ve always taken possessiveness in stride. I think its endearing. I’m a secret traditionalist. I’ve always believed men should have a say in how their women act and in what they do. But that’s not allowed. Not between us. Issues. You cannot be possessive because you just can’t. and I can’t respond to that because if I do, I’d be fooling myself into thinking that we have rights to each other, which we don’t. issues.
So, you can look all disapproving when I have a cig or when I talk about drinking, but know that I won’t necessarily do as I’m told.
rights and expectations
And about you telling me not to get plastered…
Really, you should know better
1. I feel compelled to not do what you asked.
2. Possessiveness, or trying to control is not allowed in what we have.
3. I’m a big girl.
Before you get me wrong, I think its sweet that you don’t like the smoking, or the scoping out guys to buy me drinks. I’ve always taken possessiveness in stride. I think its endearing. I’m a secret traditionalist. I’ve always believed men should have a say in how their women act and in what they do. But that’s not allowed. Not between us. Issues. You cannot be possessive because you just can’t. and I can’t respond to that because if I do, I’d be fooling myself into thinking that we have rights to each other, which we don’t. issues.
So, you can look all disapproving when I have a cig or when I talk about drinking, but know that I won’t necessarily do as I’m told.
Really, you should know better
1. I feel compelled to not do what you asked.
2. Possessiveness, or trying to control is not allowed in what we have.
3. I’m a big girl.
Before you get me wrong, I think its sweet that you don’t like the smoking, or the scoping out guys to buy me drinks. I’ve always taken possessiveness in stride. I think its endearing. I’m a secret traditionalist. I’ve always believed men should have a say in how their women act and in what they do. But that’s not allowed. Not between us. Issues. You cannot be possessive because you just can’t. and I can’t respond to that because if I do, I’d be fooling myself into thinking that we have rights to each other, which we don’t. issues.
So, you can look all disapproving when I have a cig or when I talk about drinking, but know that I won’t necessarily do as I’m told.
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